The story behind the legend
Faithful readers of Jobpostings,
You may or may not have noticed me around for the past couple of weeks. I've tried to keep a pretty low profile, but it's hard not to stick out like a sore hoof when you have a giant horn growing out of your forehead. It's finally time to answer the question that has no doubt been plaguing your mind for days.
Yes, I am a unicorn.
Revelatory stuff, I know. But now that I've finally gotten that off my chest fur, I can begin to properly introduce myself. My name is Bernie and I'm the new career ambassador at Jobpostings Magazine! I understand that this may raise some more questions like Where did you come from? Why are you here? and How are you typing this? Don't unicorns have hooves? I've asked myself these questions, too. But existential inquisition is for another time. Let's stick to the easy questions for now.
I've been hired as the resident career ambassador at Jobpostings due to my extensive job experience. You see, being a unicorn, I've lived an unnaturally long time. Much like a television series that's been running for far too long (I'm looking at you, Simpsons), I've had to constantly find new things to keep life interesting. That's why I became a career connoisseur. 
Over the years, I've gained experience in every job industry under the sun and over it (I was an astronaut once'in fact, I was the first unicorn in space!). I've written millions of cover letters, been to thousands of interviews, and worked hundreds of jobs. As a result, I know the ins and outs of it all. Just don't ask me for dating advice. (I haven't seen a lady unicorn in years. I'm starting to think they're extinct.) 
In an effort to share my knowledge with all you young, career hungry humans, I'll be writing an advice column for our website, appearing in videos on JPtv, and I might even show up to a few career fairs if I can find the time. Add @careerunicorn on Twitter to ask me questions about school, the job hunt, career advice, or life in general. I've taken the liberty of compiling a short Q&A with some of the common questions I've been asked this past week. Let's just get these out of the way now.  

Q:What is your full name?
 
A: Bernicio Darnell Buttercup, but people call me Bernie, the Magical Career Unicorn. By the way, the last person who mentioned my full name died in a horrific, entirely unrelated accident. Just saying.

Q: How old are you?
 
A: Never ask unicorns their age. They are sensitive about these types of things.

Q: How many jobs have you had?
 
A: A better question is how many jobs haven't I had?  The answer is none. Actually, I've never been a mascot now that I think about it.

Q: What was your favourite job?
 
A: Political advisor for President Bill Clinton. That, or 7-11 store clerk. That was surprisingly fun.

Q: What was your worst job?
 
A: There were no bad jobs, but if I had to pick, it would be my gig as a clown at birthday parties. Sometimes the children mistook me for the pinata.

Q: Can I ride you please?
 
A: Schedule an appointment with my secretary.

Q: Can you actually talk?
 
A: This question is making me re-evaluate the saying that there are no stupid questions.

Q: Do people really steal your hair to make wands?
 
A: Not since the accident...

Q: Marry me!?
 
A: Schedule an appointment with my secretary.

Q:Beatles or the Rolling Stones?
 
A: Abba.

Q:Why the long face?
 
A: Genetics.

Q:Can I have your number?
 
A: 7.

Q: What else does your horn do?
 
A: In college my friends used to use it to shotgun cans of beer. As for its other uses, they are a secret long kept safe by the unicorn community. If I told you, I would have to kill you.

Q: Do you like spaghetti bolognese?
 
A: Who doesn't?

Q: Does it make you mad when people compare you to a horse?
 
A: Absolutely. It's offensive. We're very clearly different species.

Q: Why aren't you called a Unihorn?
 
A: It's a long story that involves one man mishearing what I said and me feeling too awkward to correct him.

Q: Global warming ' is it a real thing?
 
A: I'm having lunch with Al Gore next week. I'll ask him.

Q: Is your poop made of glitter?
 
A: Entirely inappropriate! ...Yes, though.
 
If you have any questions about university/college, career life, or job opportunities, connect with me on Twitter, Facebook, or LinkedIn. After all, I'm here to help you land your perfect career. And don't worry, you can trust me. I'm a unicorn. 
Bernie cares.

Bernie Facebook: Bernie, the Magical Career Unicorn
Bernie Twitter: @careerunicorn
Bernie Linkedin: Bernie The Career Unicorn